me: ya, bt y?
mum : dis yr ur luck is so so... everything seem to be unsmooth..
dis conversation may seem to be superstitious... bt.. it's real.. really UNSMOOTH.. slowly i started to question?? izzit bcz of 'the power'?? fyi, 'the power' is buk about the ability to use ur 'power' to get wat u wan n wat u dont wan.. u hav to use it carefully~
back to my story..sept 2011... i was going to face my exam.. things kept on distracting me frm focusing on study.. being apart frm current frenz, some1, wat i really wanna b, my future, afta 10yrs wat i'll b, last trip, n wat's going to happen on the last day being with my awesome frenz in U......... damn!!! there r more in fact~
n so, lik attract lik.. i'm so nt aware of the -ve things to occupy dominantly (meaning, +ve power lose in the 'war' - for the 1st time), n 'the power' giv me wat i dont wan...
result was out in january 2012.. aint as expected~ tat feeling really nt tat gud.. try to imagine u falling into a deep well, no one cn c u, hear u, understand u.. sad huh?
i slowly healed.. still hav a little upset.. bt it is normal, cz every injury will left a wound..
started to apply scholarships, public U.. damn.... again, luck is nt by my side.. nt being chosen for public U interview.. n oso nt given jpa piln, pidn, n even matriks last time..... aikss... some hav poorer grade than me, cn get.. bt i jz dont get it.. dono y.. bt wat to do? there's no pause, review, n play again button.. life is still going on... i still hav to move on....
wait for admission letter, scholarship interview, pray hard, study hard during degree n get 1st clss honour.. i'm so helpless, so this is all i cn do nw...
the feeling of fear of losing, leave me alone.... i dont nid u.. i'm nt who i'm when u r here.. u jz get lost... i nid my life!!
so, god pls giv me more n more n more lucks, +ve thinking...... more n more......... n i nid u to b my side~ hope u hear me.. my voice~ my prayer~ god bless me... amitabha~
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